Repeating affirmations—positive statements designed to motivate and inspire—is a technique that many people find beneficial and is often recommended by coaches. However, for some, it may feel like a hollow or inauthentic practice. If this resonates with you, this article offers a fresh perspective on how to approach affirmation exercises.
Affirmations May Feel Uncomfortable
Self-affirmations are often used as reminders of our strengths and core values. They serve as tools to express and reflect on the qualities we already possess or wish to develop, with the goal of empowering and boosting our sense of capability. Affirmations can also be used to challenge limiting beliefs, based on the idea that repeating positive statements with enough conviction will eventually help internalize them. However, this approach doesn’t work for everyone.
Common affirmations such as “I am powerful” or “I am fearless” can feel uncomfortable to say, whether out loud or in your head. This may be especially true if you’re not accustomed to receiving praise or if you place a high value on humility. Additionally, an affirmation exercise can feel challenging if part of you struggles to truly believe the affirmation itself.
When this happens, saying affirmations can feel ineffective, as the words don’t have the intended impact because you don’t fully believe in what you’re saying.
This doesn’t mean the affirmations are untrue; rather, it may suggest that you need to approach yourself with compassion and gradually work towards fully embracing the beliefs expressed in the affirmations.
Self-affirmations are meant to inspire optimism and strength. However, if the words you’re saying conflict with your personal beliefs, they can instead leave you feeling discouraged or disheartened.
In short, affirmations should support you, not work against you. One effective approach is to reframe the statement into something you can genuinely say with conviction and belief.
For instance, it might feel challenging to use the affirmation “I am whole as I am” if there are parts of yourself you’d like to heal, develop, or change. In such cases, reframing the statement could help, such as saying: “Even though I have room to grow, I can still accept myself as I am.” Small adjustments in wording can make affirmations feel more aligned with your current mindset and easier to embrace.
If this approach could be helpful for you, consider exploring the words you use in your affirmations and the beliefs that support them with your coach in your next session.